What i wanna be?

 Back to the old time, i realize i've wasted so many things. time,money,feeling,mind,energy,etc. everything i do is useless..........
come to the point, so what would i be if i keep being like this?
there is my friend that always wonder what she wanna be. and ask me what i wanna be? i am still wondering, dreaming, but believing. god, i am afraid, i am too hopeless :'')
god... can i ? god, show me the way, stand beside me, walk with me, hold me, and guide me :"")
sorry, just my thougt.